sidebar video player for self -hosted flash files

I have tried many of the video players for wordpress, but most are not specifically for sidebar installation and most are for videos hosted off site, like youtube, etc. I am using Flash Video Player (J.Eldridge) for the posts, but it doesn’t seem to work in the sidebar. Need help making this player work in sidebar, or is there a simple player out there that works for my own hosted video files. I am not a programmer, so need something relatively simple to plug and play. One more thing: I am running the videos from my own host, so I need to be able to configure a longer buffer length time to give the video time to load. I am using the videos on this WordPress theme: Thanks.