trackbacks

I am getting some comments to various posts on my blog that contain brief excerpts of reference to my site, but when I click on the link to the commentators site I don’t actually see any such reference or particular citation of a link back to my site. The Akismet program is apparently marking these comments as “spam” in my Panel. Since I have set the controls for Comments to require my approval for all comments, none of these comments are being displayed without my approval. My question is this: How can I tell if a trackback is a legitimate reference to my site? Will the comment only include the specfic reference to my site after it has been approved and displayed in my blog? Or should such a citation be there in the basic blog or reference links on his/her site? Some further help with this matter would be appreciated. Thanks.